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Earlier this month, my wife and I had the opportunity to go to the temple and get our endowments and sealed together…on the same day!
It was quite and experience and I tried to prepare by taking the whole prior week off to not worry about work and to read the Book of Mormon and spend time with my family. After all, I was thinking, that I will be able to spend time and all eternity with my children, who are gifts from Heavenly Father, to raise, love and teach the gospel to.
It was like a first wedding for ourselves as well. When we were younger, we tied the knot in a drive through wedding chapel in Las Vegas!
We had people from our ward there, the Brother and Sister who were there as Ward Missionary Leaders to host us and have the Missionaries teach us the discussions. Our Bishop, who I admire greatly for his example he sets and his hard work and love he pours upon the people of his Ward. Our friends that we’ve made in the 21 months we’ve been going to Church. Our friends that I have from work, who are coincidentally members of the church as well and instrumental to our growth in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
The day was perfect for us. It was gloomy and rainy in Las Vegas, just how we’d hope our wedding day would have been. We met my friends, Joey and Sabrina, and Mike and Crystal. I felt guided the whole time I was in the temple, by the brethren who are there to make me feel welcomed and help me learn.
There was a lot to take in and we definitely need to go back many, many more times to figure things out. Because we were doing our endowments and sealing the same day, we were whisked away to the Sealing room to be married forever just as soon as we made it to the Celestial room of the Temple.
It was a great feeling to be in the House of the Lord among friends, whom I consider family. I urge those who have not yet made it to the temple to go as soon as you can. There are blessings to be had by attending.
At times I questioned myself if I can answer those temple recommend interview questions with no issues. I remember the last time I went for a temporary temple recommend interview back in March for Baptisms for the Dead. I caught myself being harsh when asked questions. I attribute it to judging ourselves and we are our own worse judge. My Bishop agreed.
I often find myself self-interviewing on one particular question:
Are you kind to your family members?
Am I? What does that mean? It means, do I treat them as Christ would during the good times and the bad times? Do I display patience with my family at all times? Am I a good Father and Husband?
For a while, I was in a cycle of confusion and this is how it went:
- Despair
I feel like I am in a deep hole, looking upwards at the sky and that I can’t make it out.I feel that my family deserves better than I have given in the past. I have only been at it for over 18 months and I thought I was changing. I’m not sure sometimes. At times I feel like I really have changed.I am not always patient or soft spoken in stressful situations. I seem to let the worst come out of me only in front of my spouse and children. In my early twenties, I picked up the bad habbit of swearing. My language has cleaned up over the past 18 months but I have those moments of relapse.
I expect so much from my family (from expecting the same strictness that I had to follow when I was younger) at times that it only leads me to anger and fits of yelling when things aren’t going well.
I’ve been taught that true conversion happens over time. Am I converted? Am I converted enough?
Could I stand tall with my fellow brethren who are temple recommend holders?
- Hope
Every Sunday, I feel energized and I believe that I can climb my way out of this deep hole.I realize to myself that I cannot be perfect and Christ-like at all times. That is why we have the atonement.I am thankful for the atonement and the fact that Jesus Christ took upon himself my sins, my sadness and my pain. I am thankful for the ordinance of Sacrament where I can renew my baptismal covenants and be forgiven for my short comings. During Sacrament, I feel true sorrow and pain. I then feel forgiven and my burdens lifted away.
I love the feeling of being clean and renewed for another week.
I pray for long suffering, patience, being a good example for my children and to be a better Father and Husband.
I love feeling I can start over with myself and my family.
- Confusion
I feel like the moment that I slip, no matter how high I have made it I fall to the bottom of that deep hole and I have to start over. Maybe I’ve raised my voice to my kids or handle a stressful situation very poorly. When growing up, my parents were very strict and always yelled. I see myself doing that sometimes. I see my oldest son yelling at his brothers sometimes and I see myself in him and I become deeply saddened.With the atonement comes repentance. I truly feel sorry for the mistakes and actions that make me feel like I am not kind enough to my family. But true repentance means taking steps to not do it again and then, not do it!But when I falter I feel like I have failed at repentance. I take my prior transgressions from the week before and add it on to this week as well. That deep hole is getting even deeper.
What if it has been months that I feel I’ve been doing a good job and then I mess up by losing my temper and swear up a storm and scream and yell?
When do I become better? How long do I go without slipping before I can answer “Yes” to the question “Are you kind to your family members?” It can’t be one week. A Month? Two Months?
How can I live higher laws if I cannot live these lower laws?
Am I ever going to make it to the Temple?
Go to back to Despair
I feel like I have finally broken out of this confusing cycle by realizing that during this journey of life every day we build ourselves up to be much more righteous and when we falter we have the atonement and repentance to lift ourselves up and try again. As long as we are on the upward climb we are doing well.
If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times that by doing in faith the following: Daily prayer, scripture reading, and keeping our minds constantly on the Savior Jesus Christ and the Savior make a very, very large difference.
Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock (or just busy like me) you would have noticed that mormon.org was recently changed. I noticed this sometime in late September. The changes are welcomed as the website keeps its simple architecture and is well organized for potential investigators.
The navigation tabs on the top are evidently the most important parts of the website:
- Basic Beliefs
- Worship With Us
- Ask A Question
I like that things are straight forward and to the point. Information is readily available for finding out what our Church really is about and cover:
- The Restoration of Truth
- Heavenly Father’s Plan of Happiness
- Jesus Christ: Our Savior
- The Commandments
- Membership in Christ’s Church
- And the ability to Chat Live with Missionaries.
This website is a strong missionary tool. However, it can be an even better tool if we use it in our daily lives. As members, we are constantly asked about our faith and our beliefs. Along with explaining what we believe and bearing our testimonies, referring people to mormon.org can reinforce what we teach.
Every Member a Missionary. It only takes a few moments to mention mormon.org to someone. Our brothers and sisters are waiting to hear our message about the restored gospel. It is my hope that we can all listen extra carefully to the promptings of the spirit and act on when it comes to sharing our truths.
Earlier this month, on a Saturday, my son was baptized.
It was great to help prepare him with FHE’s (family home evenings) by going through the “Preach My Gospel” manual and teaching him as my wife and I were taught not even a year ago by the missionaries. We started this process a few months before he was to turn eight and be baptized.
From going to Church and Primary (Sunday School) for the past year, he knew lots of concepts already concerning the Plan of Happiness/Salvation and the things we must do to return home again, like: being baptized, following the commandments, taking sacrament every week.
I took him to his baptismal interview the Tuesday before. (See: A Convert’s Survival Guide: What to Expect BEFORE your Baptism) I had learned that his Sunday dress shirt was missing so on the way home I ran into Wal-Mart and was in and out of the store in a record five minutes by sneaking in and out my secret location: The garden section!
When I got home, I got him dressed and we were out the door in less than three minutes. We arrived at the Church about fifteen minutes early and we waited patiently outside the Bishop’s office. The Bishop finally arrived 25 minutes later and into his office they went to talk.
I patiently waited outside for what seemed like ten to fifteen minutes until he called me in as well so he could fill out the records for his Baptism and Confirmation. I was impressed at the knowledge he divulged to the Bishop and his retention. He made me very proud.
We happily visted McDonalds’ drive thru to pick up an ice cream cone and then we drove home.
On Friday, we visited Deseret Book Store to get him his very own scriptures and carry tote. We ended up getting him a regular-sized quad which contained: The Old Testament, The New Testament, The Book of Mormon and Doctrine and Covenants. Also, we got him a CTR ring he wanted and I got a cool deal on my painting of Jesus that I talked about earlier this month.
Saturday came up very quickly. Before we left the house, I felt my heart swell as I looked at him. He looked like “a mormonboy.” I never would have thought my children to be mormon, but now I can’t imagine raising my children without the gospel and principles we have.
I have to admit, I didn’t go obsessive about preparing since I’ve been involved in two baptisms already: my own and I performed my wife’s.
A few hours before hand I got our bag ready:
Extra change of underwear for my son, an extra pair of socks as well. For myself, I brought an extra undershirt, pair of underwear and socks.
I went over with my son how our hands were to be intertwined, what I would say and how I he would plug his nose and I would put my hand behind his back to dunk him.
I also studied again what was to be said when performing his baptism, which was:
[Calling him by his full name], having been commissioned of Jesus Christ, I baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.
We arrived at the stake center a few minutes earlier than requested and we got changed into our jumpsuits. There was one more baptism taking place during the service, an eight year old girl from another ward. I was hoping I would go after they did so I could watch and be sure I was doing this correctly. This wasn’t the case, I was told that our family was going first.
We followed the usual program that I wrote about before hand in: A Convert’s Survival Guide: What to Expect at your Baptism.
I went first and took my son’s hand and led him into the font. The water was nice and warm and we set up as the little children ran to sit down on the floor in front of the font and watch. He wasn’t nervous at all, very happy. I wasn’t nervous at all either, I was guided by the Spirit and I baptized him. Immediately afterwards I could see a great, warm smile on his face. I was proud of him and gave him a little hug and led him out of the water.
Now getting changed afterwards was a different story. It was a bit could in the bathrooms and the poor boy was shivering. I worked quick to get him dried off and dressed and sent him out. I followed shortly after changing as well.
Then after they were done singing their interlude hymn, it was time for me to confirm him a member of the Church. This part I studied in the past and then again a few hours before his baptism. When I was first baptized, the man who helped us to learn the gospel and baptize me handed me a blue card with the prayers for ordinances that the priesthood can perform.
I checked and double checked and studied this card up until right after my son’s baptism, right after getting changed.
Again, it was time to confirm him a member of the Church. I looked at the attending Stake official and my wonderful Bishop to motion them up to help me confirm him. This was my first time confirming and I was very nervous. There was a lot of my non-member family members attending, some friends and the people supporting the girl that was being baptized as well. I was nervous.
It all went away when I put my hands on my son’s head and closed my eyes. I was again guided by the Spirit in confirming him a member of the Church and giving him a blessing. The words coming out my mouth came out without any filter our any forethought. I even surprised myself by what had happened. After the confirmation, my son rubbed his eyes and got up with a smile and we all congratulated him before taking our seats again.
The prayer I said to confirm my son was:
[Calling him by his full name], in the name of Jesus Christ and by the Authority of theHoly Melchizedek Priesthood, I confirm you a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and say unto you, receive the Holy Ghost. [Then a blessing as the spirit dictates].
See: A Convert’s Survival Guide: What to Expect AFTER your Baptism, to learn more about confirmation.
I was glad to have my mother-in-law there and my brother. Baptisms can be a great missionary tool, as the Spirit is undeniably present during such. My friend, Mike, who I didn’t know made it until after the service showed up afterwards and surprised me. I looked at him with a smile and told him joyfully again: “It’s all your fault!”
Also in attendance was one of the missionaries that helped teach the us our original lessons a year ago and attended my wife’s and my own baptisms. The funny story about this was that we couldn’t get a hold of them to make it to the baptism and they were coming back from fetching lunch and decided to stop by the church since they saw some cars there and then upon closer inspection, our minivan!
I was glad he could make it, it made it much more special and his support for our family is much appreciated and needed. Through crowd and confusion, I did miss a few minutes of watching my son. My missionary told me that my son said:
I want to be baptized every day!
My heart swelled again and I was proud of him for the step forward he has taken. And I am also so happy for my wonderful wife and the support and growing she has been ongoingly giving to us all. I truly couldn’t do anything without her, she is my light in the gospel. She is my best friend and she knows me and what I need, as well as she knows all my sons and what they need as well.
I am happy our family can be together forever and I am happy my sons has taken his first steps to make it back to our Heavenly Father.
I woke up and found that my wife was sick and that she wasn’t going to make it to Church. I wanted to roll over and not go to Church either after being up late the night before. Despite my better judgment, I almost did just that – until my youngest son walked in the room and I looked at him in his sweet, big, round eyes.
At that moment I realized how important Church was and even if I didn’t want to go that moment, that it would benefit my children if I took them and if I tagged along. I felt humbled and shameful for even thinking that I should just sleep in. My priorities were jumbled. Then the verse “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalms 127:3) came to my mind.
As President Gordon B. Hinckley read in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, he says:
“Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.
I have that duty to:
- Rear my children in righteousness.
- Provide for their Spiritual Needs
- Teach them to observe the commandments of God
In this case, I should observe the Sabbath day and take my children to church. I should teach my children by living a life as an example and going to Church every Sunday. These children, are not only mine, but of the Lord. And I have been given stewardship over them.
I can remember taking my children to church by myself at least one other time back in December. It is these times I appreciate my wife herding the children in the chapel and lobby. I feel lucky that both times the kids generally behaved and didn’t give me too much of a hard time.
Picking up my boys after class had its own rewards. The happiness and smiles from their faces after being in Sunday School made it more than worth it.
Shortly after being baptized, a brother in the bishopric told me to begin a journal and write down my feelings and events that happened so I can read and reflect what I felt at the time. Also, it would be useful for my children and future generations to see what I was feeling as a modern day pioneer.
I would soon find out where this sage advise originated from.
Spencer W. Kimball, the 12th President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints stated:
Begin today and write in it your goings and your comings, your deeper thoughts, your achievements, and your failures, your associations and your triumphs, your impressions and your testimonies. We hope you will do this, our brothers and sisters, for this is what the Lord has commanded, and those who keep a personal journal are more likely to keep the Lord in remembrance in their daily lives.
Just as Nephi kept records for the people who would come in the latter days, we should so the same.
I’ve searched the internet for the perfect way to keep a journal electronically and recently came across a website whose purpose is for Latter Saints to Journal online – LDSJournal.com. This is convenient and keeps your entries safe. Entries can be made via a regular web browser on a computer or done mobile via text messaging. It also promotes consistent journaling through the reminder tools it provides. Best of all, it’s FREE!
I’ve been trying it for a few days and it seems to be the ultimate solution.
Besides President Monson’s talks from 178th Annual General Conference weekend, Elder Dallin H. Oaks who is a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, is the one that has stuck with me the most.
One of the first things he said that has been ringing in my head ever since was what he said on bearing testimony, which was actually quoted from Spencer W. Kimball:
The minute we begin preaching to others, our testimony has ended.
That took me a few moments of pondering, but it makes absolute sense! Preaching is not bearing our testimonies.
The Truth
During a testimony, what do we mean when we testify and say that we know the gospel is true? When we say “I know this church is true,” what does that mean?
Elder Oaks compares it by two examples:
- Scientific- “I know it is cold outside.”
- Personal and Subjective – “I know I love my wife.”
Scientific knowledge is based on actual facts. We know it is cold because we can measure the temperature and our bodies react the freezing cold. We can prove this to others easily.
Personal and Subjective knowledge is something that others must trust you on. Knowing you love your wife is only something you could really know. While not capable of scientific proof, it is still important. You can’t say that all important knowledge is based on scientific evidence.
Scientific methods will not yield spiritual truths. To gain knowledge – you must desire it, then you ask for it.
- If thou shalt ask, thou shalt receive revelation upon revelation, knowledge upon knowledge, that thou mayest know the mysteries and peaceable things—that which bringeth joy, that which bringeth life eternal (D&C 42:61)
- Behold, I have fasted and prayed many days that I might know these things of myself. And now I do know of myself that they are true; for the Lord God hath made them manifest unto me by his Holy Spirit (Alma 5:46)
Testimonies
- Testimonies are gained bearing them rather than on your knees asking for it.
- We need to partake of the Sacrament every week to qualify to have his spirit to always be with us. That spirit gives us testimonies.
- Children should hear us bear our testimonies frequently. Let them define themselves by bearing their own testimonies and building.
- When we have a testimony of the restored gospel we also have a duty to share it. We have a duty to clarify doctrine for others, rather than let others misrepresent. We should speak in mildness and meekness, never be overbearing, shrill or reviling. We should speak the truth in love.
- Anyone can disagree with our personal testimony but no one can refute it.
Obedience and Knowledge
- Members who have a testimony and act upon it under direction of church leaders are accused of blind obedience. Our obedience is not blind but comes from the knowledge we gain through our testimonies.
- When it comes to learning and knowing the truth of the gospel, our personal testimonies, we all have a personal witness of the Jesus Christ and God through the power of the Holy Ghost.
- We can be united in following our leaders and independent for knowing for ourselves.
Two Channels to God
- Through our Leaders and Prophets. This channel has to deal with doctrine, ordinances and commandments. This results in obedience.
- Personal Testimony. The existence of God, our relationship to him and the truth of the restored gospel.
- These two channels are mutually reinforcing.
- Knowledge encourages obedience and obedience enhances knowledge,
- Obedience is not blind when done in knowledge.
- Choice to follow teachings is not blind obedience.
I began writing this post write after this session but never got around to finishing it until now. Since then, the actual transcript of Elder Oaks’ talk can now be found on lds.org by clicking here.
Here are some important points I took away from the talk given by Elder Russell M. Nelson, member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, during the 178th Annual General Conference this weekend:
- Salvation is an individual matter.
- Exaltation is a family matter.
- Family is the support for Salvation.
- The home is a laboratory for learning the gospel.
- Men need women to be exalted and visa versa.
- We cannot be released in our calling as parents.
- The Church is to assist, not replace parents in their responsibility to teach children.
- Parents have a sacred responsibility to teach Children of God.
- We’re taught to shun filth.
- We’re taught to honor thy parents.
- You can teach only by persuasion, long suffering, reproving, and more love.
- We’re all responsible for our own salvation.
These key points from his talk should echo in our minds. In the bigger scheme of things, we are merely stewards of our children on Earth. Our children are children of God entrusted under our car to teach them, to protect them and to love.
I also like his point on how Church is to assist and not replace parents. I believe that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints reinforces and strengthens our families. It should reiterate what is learned in the home and not be something new when taught during our Sunday Schools.
I’m sure you’ve heard this many, many times before, but I think it makes sense to repeat these words of wisdom:
If you were to erase everything your children learn in Sunday School and Church and strictly rely on what is taught at home, would they still have the same level of knowledge of the Gospel as if they did attend Church and Sunday School?
I hope so.
This weekend was the 178th Annual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
I could remember it like it was only yesterday that it was General Conference in October and it was all new to me. This time around it felt like old hat. I actually woke up at 9am to watch the conferences. I enjoyed all the messages that were given and I have found a new appreciation for our first presidency. I really didn’t know anything about the first presidency a year ago and I didn’t know Gordon B. Hinckley.
I’m glad I got to know Hinckley during the last conference before he passed. I’ve come to appreciate all that he’s done for the Church.
It was the first time I’ve seen the calling and sustaining of a Prophet and his First Presidency. I felt the Spirit as Utchdorf read off the names of our new leaders. Even though I was at home, watching in my bedroom at 9am in the morning in my t-shirt and shorts, I was engaged enough to stand and sustained each and everyone of them by raising my right hand. It was a wonder to me knowing that members around the world must be standing as well raising their right hand to sustain as well.
I am so impressed with the new First Presidency! I never really knew Thomas S. Monson before this general conference. He had also surprised me with his humor and his stories. I remember Henry B. Eyring from before and loved hearing what he had to say. And Dieter F. Uchtdorf is so likable and has such a friendy and welcoming characteristic about himself.
I’ve felt my testimony strengthened watching this conference and seeing the leadership of this Church. These men are absolutely called of God. Their words are divinely inspired without a doubt. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is absolutely the church of our Savior, Jesus Christ. This is his Church.
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